Emotionally Wounded
This story highlights how deep wounds can linger even when remorse is expressed.
Read Time: 3 minutes
During a family gathering, Orson thoughtlessly1 remarked about his cousin Alora’s weight. Though he intended no harm, his careless words struck deep, leaving Alora feeling hurt and the target of teasing.
Years passed, and another family reunion brought familiar faces together. But it also brought unresolved tension to the surface. Orson observed Alora from across the room. Her presence deepened the weight of his guilt and the burden of the task before him. He remembered the carelessness of his words and the pain they caused.
Summoning his courage, Orson approached his cousin. With a low, steady voice, he quietly said to her, “Alora, I need to apologize. The last time we spoke, I said wrong and hurtful things. I am truly sorry. Please forgive me.”
Alora’s smile vanished as the painful memory rushed back—the humiliation, the stares, and the pitiful looks. The anger she had fought so hard to bury returned. Her piercing eyes locked on Orson, and with a bitter voice, she said, “Oh, I remember. Sorry, it doesn’t erase what you said. Wounds like that just don’t disappear, and forgiveness is far from being considered.”
Orson stood in silence. Her words cut deep, but he didn’t argue or defend himself. Instead, he nodded and softly whispered, “I understand.” Without another word, he turned and walked away. An apology was offered but not accepted.2
If we were Orson or Alora, how would we respond? This story highlights how deep wounds can linger even when remorse is expressed. While apologies are vital, they don’t always erase the pain or repair trust if we leave God out of the equation for healing.
Colossians 3:13 is a good reminder to “forgive as the Lord forgave.” This request applies to everyone, whether we have caused harm or been deeply hurt. When we choose to forgive offenses, we release the weight of resentment and embrace the peace found in Christ. Mark 11:25 is emphatic “When you stand praying, if you hold anything against anyone, forgive them, so that your Father in heaven may forgive you your sins.”3
When Peter asked how many times he should forgive, Jesus replied, “Not seven times, but seventy-seven times.” (Matthew 18:21-22).4 Jesus was telling Peter he should forgive his brother a limitless number of times. Forgiveness has no limits. It is a continual process, not limited to a few of life’s significant moments. Whether it’s Joseph pardoning his brothers, Jesus extending mercy to those who crucified him, or the unmerciful servant refusing to show compassion, each of these instances emphasizes God’s call for us to forgive.
Jesus taught the importance of reconciling with others before approaching his Father in prayer (Matthew 5:23-24). Forgiveness isn’t only for the one who is forgiven; it frees both people from emotional pain. It shows God’s love in our lives and is a powerful reminder of Jesus’ sacrifice on the cross. Just as he bore the weight of our sins to offer us salvation, we are called to give grace (bestowal of blessings) to others.
If we are unwilling to forgive even small matters, it can harden our hearts, making reconciliation even more difficult. Forgiveness depends on our willingness to extend mercy. It mirrors God’s mercy and shapes us to grow in humility, compassion, and love. When we forgive, we actively live out the grace we’ve received, fostering peace and unity within the body of Christ and beyond.
That peace is not fleeting but a lasting peace, deeply rooted in faith and trust in Jesus’ love.
Patricia Ferguson,
Past member of the now closed
Orangeville Ecclesia, ON
- “Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what helps build others up according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen.” (Ephesians 4:29).
- Basically, an apology has four elements: I’m sorry. I was wrong. Please forgive me. I love you.
- All Scriptural citations are taken from the New International Version, unless specifically noted.
- Translators of the Bible are advised to translate the expression as “seventy times seven.“ Commentators are advised to explain that although the phrase equates to four hundred and ninety, it symbolically signifies the completion of forgiveness for all sins that could be committed against someone. Jesus speaks of forgiveness beyond what anyone had ever considered: seventy times seven!